Monday, December 31, 2012

So This Is New Year's

I've been taking a photo a day for all of December, and today will be the last one.  "Fun."  I'm thinking of stacking some board games that we're going to play with the kids later.  Though I could take a picture of my new camera.  Teehee!

Traditionally I suppose a New Year's Eve blog post should be a reflection on the blog year past.  But this blog has been very quiet of late.  I do apologize.  I guess my inner foodie had more to say than I thought.  Though to be fair, I've only got just over a dozen posts on My Edible Journey so far.  But it's only been going since July.

I could look ahead.  I've been hearing about this "one word" thing ( where you choose/meditate about/stumble upon or otherwise somehow discover your "word" for the coming year.  I could do that, I suppose.  Though I don't know how much impact would be from the word and how much would be from me conforming situations to fit the word.  I'll pray.  We'll see.

I don't do resolutions.  Ever.  I could.  There are loads of things I could beat myself up over, from how the house is kept to how I spend my time to my health and well being, to my faith....  Pretty much everything is fair game for change in some way.  Heck, I could resolve to abolish my nemesis, sausage McMuffins, from my diet (sing it with me... "My neme, neme, oooo... my neme, neme, nemesis"  Okay, you have to be familiar with Phineas and Ferb to get that one). 

But resolutions have this irritating way of making me focus on the object instead of the objective.  And I fixate.  And then I beat myself up when I fail.  It's a case of going where you look versus looking where you want to go.  Put up a roadblock to something and I'll head straight into it.  This is why I don't commit to October Unprocessed.  I meet the challenge feeling pressure to not fail, rather than feeling able to succeed.

So how do I approach January 1st?  With release.  I let it all go.  The expectations, the intentions, the resolutions.  Even the Christmas decorations come down in advance of it. 

I try accept not only who I am, but the journey that I am on.  The journey is what brings challenge and change.  My job is to stay the course, not plot it.  In this past year I've had glimpses of Glory, flirted with delving into things that have called me deeper, seen myself both grow and shrink (I've dropped about 10% of my body weight since this time last year, without resolutions, plans or programs) and have discovered more about who I am, what I believe and what I am capable of than ever before.  I've embraced turning 40, allowed myself to question what I thought I believed and what I thought I was supposed to believe, and let go of some serious spiritual baggage.  Or at least bagged and tagged it for disposal.

January 1st isn't an event, but it does call me to reflect and pause, which I'd like to do more of.  Maybe that can be my resolution.  *wink*

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